He Could Teach You, But He'd Have to Charge

Just like I love a woman who can help me put together my furniture, few things make me happier than a dude who will dip it, pop it, twerk it, stop it for all of YouTube to see.



That ghostly chill you just felt was his killing you hoes.

Lil' Coop Is GANGSTA

So you've probably already heard about your (and my) boyfriend Anderson Cooper talkin' shit on Living Lohan while he was filling in for Regis on Regis & Kelly. Then Dina Lohan made a statement to OK! Magazine in response, saying it was "bad karma" for Anderson to be so "cruel."

What, you thought he was going to apologize? Ol' Silver Fox keeps it too real. Check the video.

So now, Ali's father Michael Lohan has stepped in saying:

I think Anderson Cooper is an opinionated, hypocritical idiot who should be an adult and keep his opinion to himself. He is the last person to judge anyone, when he and his own family have their own issues.

He obviously doesn't know how deep AC rolls. I could round up at least 30 girls and gays to ride on his ass TONIGHT. Watch yourself, Lohan.

Obvious Douchebag Alert: Code Red

Is he out of his fuckin mind??

If you haven't heard, Toby Keith's new movie (damn this recession!) and single, both titled "Beer for My Horses," actually advocate lynching. That's right: lynching.

Grandpappy told my pappy, back in my day, son
A man had to answer for the wicked that he done
Take all the rope in Texas
Find a tall oak tree, round up all of them bad boys
Hang them high in the street for all the people to see

...Back up the damn bus. How did we get here?


I guess free speech is free speech, but I'm actually more than a little disappointed Stephen Colbert let him perform this mess on his show.

Beyond that, I imagine Mr. Keith's tour won't be making any stops in Compton or Bed-Stuy so he may not have much to worry about. You and I on the other hand need to be on full Douchebag Alert. The disease is highly contagious and may have already affected someone you know and love.

The Burger Rap

Make no mistake about it--- white people are CRAZY.

Really??

The mind boggles. I won't say I didn't laugh out loud, though.

If you want to know more about this nutbag, you're gonna have to check out the writeup at Crunk and Disorderly (and ask yourself why she's wearing Madonna's getup from the "Like a Virgin" video); I am at a loss for words.

Best Website EVER

I guess I decided to make today the day I look at things that everyone else has known about for months.

But regardless, Stuff White People Like is quite possibly the most fantastic website in the history of websites. Favorite entries thus far include:

#72 Study Abroad
#71 Being the Only White Person Around
#58 Japan
#53 Dogs
#25 David Sedaris
#21 Writer's Workshops
#14 Having Black Friends
#11 Asian Girls
#4 Assists


Mainly because reading each of those was like reading a mini-biography of at least one of my white friends (or, in some cases, enemies). But I guess that's the whole point of the site . . .


(Note: Apparently the comments section of the site is to be avoided. Ever since the advent of YouTube I avoid pretty much all online message board situations, excepting the commenters at Crunk and Disorderly who consistently crack me up. But the SWPL comments are full of people taking the site way too seriously and being way too racist; so, enjoy the site, skip the douchebags.)