Now that he's recovered from surgery following a major car accident with a "female family friend," Morgan Freeman has confirmed that he and his wife of 20+ years are getting a divorce.
...mmmhmm
Having the jaws of life drag your ass out of the wreckage should been enough of a sign that God don't like ugly, Mr. Freeman. I'm just saying.
Look, all the details aren't out yet, but if it walks like a douchebag and talks like a douchebag; well, you know the rest. So I'm putting Morgan Freeman on notice. I don't give a hot damn how cute those penguins were.
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